fear has the taste of metal,
scarcity has the feel of sick,
bless me Goddess for I am your child,
it is too cold in this place.
Over the last month, headaches, fatigue, extreme exhaustion, nausea and body aches have continued to be my ongoing physical symptoms. Barbara Hand Clow says we are in the “dark night of the soul”, and she’s not kidding, is she? All my soul’s shadows have creeped up to be examined and I imagine, purged as they cannot live in this new energy. “Fear is merely excitement without breath”, says Fritz Perls. I guess I must remember how to breathe, as I spent the better part of the month burrowing in my rabbit hole in extreme fear. Barbara Hand Clow also stated that this moon and the astrological conjunctions presented abundant creativity and insights for growth. I felt those small beams of light at times and took advantage of the energy when I could. What I desired more than anything this moon though was sanctuary!
One of my favourite sanctuary’s is a waterfall in the rainforest of Belize called Clarissa Falls. The actual waterfall is quite small, but what an explosive sound it creates as it cascades down the foothills of Guatemala into Belize. Moments after I arrive at this sacred grove, all my worries, stress, and fear simply roll off of my body and into the accepting waters of the Belize River. In times of need. this place has been my refuge and my Saviouress offering a thorough rejuvenation of my soul. It is at Clarrisa Falls that I find Kuan Yin sitting at the waterfall in all her splendor and glory. Patiently, she awaits my confessions of grief, loneliness, sorrow, loss, mistakes or regret. It is at Clarrisa Falls that Kuan Yin helps me to regain my equilibrium, joy, freedom of spirit and lightness of heart.
Most recently, I was longing for a visit to Clarrisa Falls, hence Kuan Yin, yet, it proved an impossible want. Simultaneously, my neighbor came over to invite me and my children out for a boat ride. A boat ride which sounded so lovely, especially in the middle of a workday. My work ethic and mind said, “WORK”. My playful spirit and heart said, “GO”. Knowing that I must practice what I preach… I listened to my heart and took the boat ride. I thought we would just be circling the island with the kids, rather, we ended up anchoring the boat on Belize’s Great Barrier Reef, which is located a mere half mile from my island home. We killed the engine and what do you know? The sound of the reef on this particularly still day was as overwhelming as my waterfall. I heard Kuan Yin softly laugh in the background. She asked, “You requested my presence?”.
Indeed I had! “Kuan Yin, Goddess of Mercy, be with us now. We are in the times of great sorrow and your presence will be much needed!” Living not too far away, in geographic terms, from Haiti, I am bound to be exposed over the next months to the “mal vientos” (ill winds) that are guareenteed to blow our way. Allow me to explain… The Maya believe, and I have witnessed firsthand, that ill omens blow in prior to the manifestation of some intense life experience. The Maya are extremely sensitive to the “feeling’ of the wind. That is why if the wind feels bad, weird, or strange- they will immediately close all their windows and take shelter from such a wind. For whosoever should “catch” the wind in their body would be the recipient of the energies yet to come.
In the Lakota tradition, the wind is called Tate. The wind is one of the sixteen great mysteries of life. The wind is all that was and all that ever will be. The wind can be gentle and caressing or full of destruction. The wind always blows softly at first. If humans do not listen, then the wind will change its course to blow with force. Let us then listen to the soft breeze which is saying, “We are one”. In the Facebook profile, it asks for your favourite quote. Mine is by an ex-prime minister of Belize which states, “all of weh deh one” (this translates from Creole to “all of us are one people”). The new world prerequisites are compassion for our fellow human and their experiences, lending a helping hand if we can, and joining forces to make a better world.
Our new world is here and for some of us life is getting easier, sweeter and making more sense. A few people understand the energy, the new navigational laws. A chosen handful are the new leaders, speakers, and visionaries of these times. Some more conscious souls know how to manuever themselves in this new current, even as the old world is dying at their feet. Even so, it will be helpful to remember, a dying dinosaur is a dangerous creature. Haiti is big news NOW, but in a few days or weeks from now, the masses and general public of the western world will have forgotten Haiti and will have gone on to the next most newsworthy story. Haiti’s problems though have just begun. Haiti’s dilemma could be one of our world’s dinosaurs if we are not careful. If a compassionate world can tackle these problems, then Haiti presents an immense opportunity for new growth and for rebuilding with green shoots. Haiti can actually become the promise of the new world (as we have witnessed by the world’s heartfelt generosity) . If the Haitians are left forgotten and forsaken, do not for a moment believe that we will be immune to their circumstances. Winds blow and they blow where they must.
The year 2004 ,which gave us the catastrophic tsunami of Indonesia, blew the “mal vientos” into my life. Three days after this particular tsunami, I was also invited out onto a boat with my children. The captain, unbeknownst to me at the time, drove the boat out onto the great “blue” (the Caribbean Sea, instead of inside the reef where I live) where the winds were blowing wild. Two of my children proceeded to get motion sickness and vomit. Two of my other children and myself later that night got sick with flu-like symptoms. One week after the tsunami, my daughter Isabella died. Her diagnosis was an extremely fast moving bacterial infection, something akin to dysentery. The head of pediatrics at our local hospital was our doctor. He proceeded to order, through the state health department, an island wide search of all the places I had eaten and visited in the month preceeding our sickness. He, at first thought that the island of Caye Caulker may have an epidemic on their hands. I told the doctor of our trip to sea and that I had a strong suspicion that we had all contracted something airborne (from the tsunami). As the health department could find no source of illness in the water sources used in the restaurants or my home, he told me that my theory was quite possible.
I kept demanding that the Gods’ give me an explanation for my only daughter’s death. I had been gifted with incredible home births (Isa’s being the most spectacular) and even more incredible Indigo, Crystal and Star children. I simply could not understand this twist of fate. Three days after my daughter’s death, I dreamt of her in heaven. She played a violin for me and showed me her new world… she was one of heaven’s best musicians and had been called “home” to play the return music for all the lost souls of the tsunami. She asked me to please understand, to have compassion, as this path was her plan & purpose and was more important to her than her life on Earth. She told me she would be in high demand over the next years. It would take many moons for me to digest this dream.
Again, if you can do nothing other than pray, please do. “Kuan Yin, She Who Hears the Cries of the World. Be amongst us now as so many of our brothers and sisters are in pain. Please grace our presence with some form of comfort and hope as despair seems to be everywhere. Please provide us with all our earthy needs as the children will still grow, the babies will still be born and the survivors will need to go on! Please do not let those blessed with prosperity, sink into forgetfulness and comfort as so many of our fellow humans on the planet suffer. Please let us give generously from our hearts. Amen!” (www.helpthechildren.org or http://www.savethechildren.org)
“Kuan Yin, Ascended Master who has walked before us. Gentle Goddess who heals and forgives even the most evil and wicked. Do not forsake us in our time of need”, I prayed.
“I am here. Find me anywhere”, she replied.
This prayer and the Goddess’ answer conjured up a memory that occurred just one month prior. I was in Venice Beach, California, walking with a friend of mine named Mary. She had been saying the day before that she wanted a statue of Kuan Yin like the one I had in my home. She was wondering where could she purchase such an item. As we walked the beach, peering at all the vendors; she, I and our children were all drawn to an old hippies booth which was full of misc… junk. Old toys, magazines, baseball cards, incense, oils, garden items, etc… As soon as we walked into the booth, I could feel Her. I just knew in my bones that a Kuan Yin statue was to be found here. Sure enough, in the very back of the booth, hidden in an obscure corner, was the exact statue I own. Mary now has her Kuan Yin. How timely!
I had a dream the other night. I dreamt that I was sleeping and dreaming and while I was asleep and dreaming, a group of extraterrestrials landed on the earth, simultaneously touching ground. As they sunk into the soil of Earth, an electricity left their body through their feet sending out a beam of magnetic energy which travelled until all their energies were connected (looking much like a scene from Avatar). This energy, and their power, altered the memory codes on Earth. The ET’s held their position for 24 hours until every human could feel the new electrical currents. In my dream, as I woke up, I woke up, awakened. It was no longer an intellectual fact that I am powerful, it was rather, a body remembrance. I knew without a doubt, I am the power.
There are miracles amongst us. There are angels in human form. There are ascended masters walking the planet. Hear the soft wind…these times are a changing. “Be the change you want to see in the world” says Ghandi. Before the time of great sorrow has ended, millions more will lose their lives and their homes. Currently 1/6 of the planet is starving. Hoards of people are in serious and desperate need. Let us not forget the world situations currently playing out in the countries of Africa, Asia, India, Central America, the Middle East and the Caribbean. The despair of the masses will not go unnoticed. The winds will blow. Combine those winds with the collective fear of the modern world as consumerism and money continue to disappear. The strong winds grow, Tate says…change or die! Go now, my friends and readers, compose a powerful prayer and help the old world disintegrate with grace! Be the miracle. Be the angel. Walk into your role as the ascended master. Do not be afraid, Kuan Yin is here. Her compassion can be found everywhere. We are on the new Earth and yes, indeed, we are the Power!
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